One Man's Best Friend
Submitted: Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 15:15
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GU-Nissan
Hi All,
Today I have had to make one of the hardest decisions of my life, and that is to have my best mate and companion of 12 and 1/2 years put to sleep tomorrow. His name is Kirby and he is a Doberman cross. He has the most wonderful disposition and personality I have ever come across in any living thing.
About May/June last year he was diagnosed as having Osteo Sarcoma, a very aggressive and virtually untreatable form of bone cancer, and at that time the vet gave me an estimate of about 3 months to live. The initial location of these tumours were on his left shoulder blade and his lower jaw, but the most damaging has been his RR leg/ankle area progressively swelling to the size of a large
orange.During these last months I have had to watch as this horrible disease gradually robbed him of his mobility, suffering in silence an ever increasing
level of pain and discomfort that I was powerless to prevent or halt. It has now advanced to the point that this horrible disease has erupted through the skin of his ankle in a large running sore.
He has been with me through some rough times in my life, and has been one of the very few things that I could absolutely rely upon, without being critical//negative. He has been a
rock of comfort for me during these periods, and his happiest moments seem to have been when he is lying close to me, and I have taken great joy and comfort from his presence.
I now have to try to remain strong while I comfort my 16 yo daughter (who will take this very hard) and somehow help her through this, and don't know if I can. (I am in tears as I write this).
I don't really know how to finish this letter except to say that I had a need to write this somewhere, and hope that you understand I was not really simply fishing for some sympathy.
To all of out there who have lost pets I think you will know how I feel.
RIP Kirby
Ross Thomson
Reply By: Member - Alastair D (NSW) - Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 15:32
Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 15:32
Ross,
You have my best wishes and sympathy. Have had to do this twice - once not so long ago. A loyal dog is truly something we get very attached to.
Even sending you my best wishes makes me feel upset and brings back both sad and happy memories.
Be strong and give Kirby a hug from all here.
alastair
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Reply By: Kev M (NSW) - Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 15:36
Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 15:36
Ross,
I know how your feeling, we had our Collie cross Shephard put down in similar circumstances about 2 years ago. We are yet to replace her as we want to get another pup but ATM we don't have the time to properly train one.
I made the mistake of hanging the bug zapper up with her old collar at the start of summer and when ever the wind blows the noise from the collar makes us think of her. SWMBO went crazy the first time it happened as she thought I gone and gotten a new pup for her. Only to find out I hadn't.
I do suggest that you let the vet do the deed without being there as it shook us up for a while after and it caused my daughter some anxiety with dogs for about 12 months after. We didn't have a few days notice, as it was just a weekly
check up that she didn't come
home from.
I am sure that you know that you have made the right decision and that all concerned understand.
Regards Kev
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Reply By: Member - Col G (WA) - Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 15:46
Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 15:46
Ross.
Been there and done that, its a decision you had to make, just remember that while you had your best mate you provided him with a loving
home and good life.
All the best for the future.
Col
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Reply By: Scoey (QLD) - Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 15:48
Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 15:48
Hey
Ross,
My condolences and best wishes to you and your family at this time. I know
well the pain of losing a faithful dog and also being the one to make the call to put him/her to sleep. Take the time to celebrate Kirby's life as I'm sure he wouldn't want to think he's making you sad.
Dogs are truely amazing creatures, and personally every dog I've ever had has been a member of my family.
In the words of Andy Rooney, "The average dog is a nicer person than the average person." and Kirby sounds like an exceptional person! ;-)
Best wishes,
Ross (aka Scoey)
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Reply By: dj Patrol - Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 15:56
Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 15:56
Ross,
I had to do the same as you six months ago and he is still deeply in my thoughts every day as I can tell you that its one of the hardest and saddist days of my life.But you have gotta do what you must do to stop the pain for them.You will never forget them but just keep remembering the good times you had.Every day I came
home he was there to meet me now he,s not.
My feelings are with you and Ill have a tear in my eye for you an ya mate.
PS. Dont leave it too long go get another one you wont be sorry I did.
djpatrol
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Reply By: Bilbo - Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 16:17
Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 16:17
Ross,
I really sympathise mate. It's hearbreaking.
I often think of the day when I'll have to say goodbye to me little mate. It's gonna happen one day, and I know that I'll just break apart.
You did the right thing
Ross. It's all you could have done and he loved you as much you loved him. AND he'll know why ya did it. They ain't stupid mate. He probably often wondered why you didn't do it before you did.
RIP Kirby.
Bilbo
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Follow Up By: gav99x - Monday, Mar 12, 2007 at 12:44
Monday, Mar 12, 2007 at 12:44
Wise words Bilbo,
well said.
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Reply By: Member -Signman - Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 16:22
Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 16:22
I'll give my 'LADY' (15yo Samoyed cross something) an extra cuddle when I get
home from work this arvo..
Our condolences to all your family.
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Reply By: True Blue - Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 16:24
Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 16:24
Certainly do know how you feel
Ross. Our sympathy to goes out to you and your family.
Ross (gee now I'm teary as
well) this dog will never cease to exist in your heart as long as you have the memories of that loving, unconditional bond between your dog and yourself. The animal has certainly supported you in his lifetime in exchange for having you as an equally adoring master. The dog knows that you love it and I feel mother nature (my god) will look after the animal from hear in.
One last thing you can do for this dog
Ross is too cuddle it, in an act of love, whilst it is being put to sleep. Don't look, just concentrate on the animal.
Ross, the injection is so fast you won't believe it, and the dog's pain will be history.
Your pain will go on but will be consoled by memory. In the meantime your dog's soul/spirit (take your pick) will go on. It won't have gone, just moved. Seek it elsewhere and you will find it.
Till next time Kirby ......
With sympathy, Wayne.
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Reply By: Member - Blue (VIC) - Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 16:25
Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 16:25
I feel for ya
Ross... Given the nature of the illness, perhaps you and your daughter can take some comfort from knowing the suffering has ended...
As a side note, be careful of how the shock affects you too... I found my only thought after my mate died was "Now I only have to buy half as much dog food", I had 2 dogs... This thought disturbed me and made me angry, angry to the point I nearly caused a fairly sizeable accident through my inattention at the wheel...
Blue
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Reply By: Member - Oldplodder (QLD) - Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 16:30
Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 16:30
Ross,
Same with us a few years ago. Male blue heeler / rotweiler cross. Agressive bone cancer in the shoulder. When diagnosed by the vet we asked what shall we do and when. He said you will know when, and it is terminal.
After watching him struggle to eaven leave his kennel, we knew it was time, so the vetwas good enough to come around our place and put him down laying in the sun in his favourite place. All the family were there and had a last pat. Buried him in the front yard. Still say hello sometimes as I go past.
You have got a couple of tears going here to from the memory.
Just remember, real men cry, go and have a few tears with your daughter. It is only those wimps who won't allow themselves a few tears, because they don't / can't commit themselves to a friend or mate.
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Follow Up By: where2go - Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 20:51
Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 20:51
Well said.
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Reply By: Voxson - Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 16:42
Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 16:42
Hey
Ross....
I am already dreading "The Deed",,, and
mine is only 5....
I will tell you a little secret mate,,,,, dont tell anyone....
"if i was driving down the road and a dog and a person jumped out in front of my car i would probably swerve at the person"
I know how you feel,, feeling it a bit now actually....
Last time,,, 6yrs ago,,,, my last little mate,,,i almost had to send him in with a friend because i couldnt walk through that vet door...
Every time i take my dog to the vet he gives me that "look",,,
well within their rights arent they???..............................................................
All the best,,, it's enevitable when you inherit a dog that this day will come....
The next one is always better though because in every dog that you have had you can train a little bit of each of your last into him/her...
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Reply By: Gramps (NSW) - Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 17:37
Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 17:37
Ross,
Like those above, I know how you feel. I've been through this a few times and it does'nt get any easier. After the first, I swore never to own a dog again. Just remember the good times, they far outweigh the sad.
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Reply By: Eric from Cape York Connections - Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 17:38
Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 17:38
Ross that story brought a tear to my eye.
It would totally destroy me if I had to put my dog down she spends every day with me at work and as you said never leaves my side.
It will be a very hard day tomorrow good luck.
All the best
Eric
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Reply By: Member - Doug T (W.A) - Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 18:02
Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 18:02
Ross
Me and Little Dusty send you sympathy in your loss, I know it is something I am going to have to face someday too , and If you love yours as I love mine ........
Doug and Dusty
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Reply By: Ozrover - Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 18:12
Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 18:12
Ross.
My condolences on losing a special member of the family, we lost one of ours two weeks ago due to a bad heart (11 years old terrier cross), so I can relate to how you feel.
Brings a tear to the eye's just thinking about it! 8 (>
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Reply By: Member - Rossco td105(WA) - Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 19:04
Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 19:04
Ross,
My best wishes to you mate, I have been there and dread having to do it again. Take heart from all the good times you have had with your 'best mate' and cherish these times. You have brought a tear to my eye and my thoughts are with you, our dogs are truly our best friends,
Rossco.
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Reply By: Ray Bates - Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 19:14
Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 19:14
Hi
Ross,
My condolences also. I have been there and done that. It is a terrible experience but I'm afraid it come to us all at some time in our lives. I hope that you are
young enough to be able to get another four legged friend.
In my case I am 71 yrs of age and my doggy daughter is coming up to 12 years of age and showing it. Unlike you I would not be able to get another four legged friend as at my time of life they could outlive me and I believe that that would be a tragedy.
At least you have the satisfaction that Kirby will be going to meet his maker in an honerable way not like some humans that are made to suffer an excruciating death
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Reply By: Member - Dunworkin (WA) - Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 19:24
Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 19:24
Hi
Ross, sympathy to you and your daughter. We know how you are feeling, we are going through the same process. Our dog was diagnosed with osteosarcoma in her RR leg in November, Simba (our dogie) is a Kelpie/Collie cross and was in very good condition up to a couple of hours before the diagnosis (found because she actually
broke her leg.) We have opted for amputation and chemo which the vet advised would only give her another twelve months, but like you we know that when the time comes we will be heading down your path.
I had tears in my eyes as I was reading your post as I know how close we are to having to do the same.
Good luck tomorrow and by the look of all the caring replies there will be a lot of people like me feeling for you and your daughter.
Cheers
Deanna
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Reply By: Member - bushfix - Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 20:05
Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 20:05
with you there mate. has happened to me three times. damn i wish they would live longer than us. don't think i can go through it again so am holding off getting another dog.
still, take with you the joy that Kirby was yours and you shared so much together. Kirby was also attached to your daughter and she will have many stories to keep close.
gather the photos you have, plant a tree for him, give thanks, you have experienced a tremendous gift called Kirby, still and always your mate eh?
grand name, grand mate eh
Ross?
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Reply By: Mike Harding - Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 20:23
Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 20:23
I feel for you
Ross - I miss my little dog lots - only time helps (but never totally heals) grief - sadness is the price we pay for love - worth it too I think :) go well
Ross.
Mike Harding
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Reply By: where2go - Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 20:49
Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 20:49
Just gave my girl another cuddle. No words can really do justice to how you must be feeling so I will keep this short. Just know that there are a lot of people on here who are thinking of you (us included) and, if you feel the need, come back and let us know how you are later tomorrow.
Thinking of you.
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Follow Up By: where2go - Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 20:54
Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 20:54
In fact, please let us know how you are. We will all be thinking of you. Hug your daughter tight.
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Reply By: kiwicol - Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 21:54
Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 21:54
ooooxxxxx.Col
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Reply By: Kazz44 - Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 23:01
Friday, Mar 09, 2007 at 23:01
Hi Ross,
I am sorry to hear about your loss, I am glad some one out there has genuine problems not just that they have a
fridge that doesn't work or a flat abttery propblem{not mocking you guys at all}, but it is nice to hear that we are very sentimental, I think we all learn from these experiences and exspecially your daughter will find this very educating to her even though painful.
Life isn't forever and the ones we have with us for how ever long are always here to educate us in some way or another.
RIP Kirby dear beloved friend and companion and will always be remembered by all those who new him and by all those who missed the oportunity to know him but is remembered by his master Ross. Kind regards Kaz
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Reply By: Wisebyname - Saturday, Mar 10, 2007 at 09:14
Saturday, Mar 10, 2007 at 09:14
Hi Ross
Sorry to read of the loss of your mate. Feeling for you and your daughter.
Kirky will be at peace. No more pains for him.
Regards
Andy
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Reply By: RichieK - Saturday, Mar 10, 2007 at 10:50
Saturday, Mar 10, 2007 at 10:50
Our thoughts are with you..There are dogs, then there are "angel-dogs" - Kirby sounds like one of those...
Rich and Family
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Reply By: Sand Man (SA) - Saturday, Mar 10, 2007 at 10:52
Saturday, Mar 10, 2007 at 10:52
Ross,
My sympathy to you and your family as well.
Went though a similar experience a few months ago, but in my case decided to buy a new companion straight away. It has worked out well for us.
To help you guys come to terms with your loss, may I put the following perspective across:-
What was best for the dog?
Prolonged suffering or a painless release.
Just remember the good times you had together and be happy for those times.
Our new puppy is a little bugger but we know he will mature into a faithful companion like our previous one was.
I trust you guys will get over your loss in time.
Good luck and just keep smiling over those memories!
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Reply By: _gmd_pps - Saturday, Mar 10, 2007 at 20:31
Saturday, Mar 10, 2007 at 20:31
It is much much worse to see a close relative suffer and you can NOT put them to sleep. I have done the same thing a couple of years ago and the positive thing is that you do NOT have to let your best friend suffer.. that what helped me .. it had to be done ..
all the best
gmd
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Reply By: Member - Brian H (QLD) - Saturday, Mar 10, 2007 at 23:48
Saturday, Mar 10, 2007 at 23:48
Been there done that 3 times now.......... none get easier ........ but to watch the suffering and the looks, you know its time.
Sometimes its better to be cruel, to be kind, at least the suffering will now be over.
Sorry about your pet / mate just remember the good times.
Brian
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Reply By: uneekwahn - Saturday, Mar 10, 2007 at 23:50
Saturday, Mar 10, 2007 at 23:50
Ross, the tears have started to swell up in my eyes and my hear genuinely bleeds for you.
I had to make the same tough decision a number of years ago and whilst it hurt me and still pains me to this day, it was the right decision to make for my gorgeous girl Ebony, a black lab x german shepherd.
Be happy knowing that you've removed your friend from a lot of pain and suffering.
Take care.
Jason.
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Reply By: Im.away - Sunday, Mar 11, 2007 at 00:06
Sunday, Mar 11, 2007 at 00:06
Like so many of the others that have responded Ross, I share your pain. My old girl had to go last August. I don't know why, but I felt I had to do it myself. It was hard but at least that way we were together until the very end.
We haven't replaced her..we just couldn't.
I hope things work out for you and your daughter.
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Reply By: Member - Mary W (VIC) - Sunday, Mar 11, 2007 at 19:44
Sunday, Mar 11, 2007 at 19:44
Hi Ross,
When my dear old Donny had to go a kind friend sent me this poem.I trust it will be of comfort to you and your daughter as it was for me.Mary
A DOGS LIFE
Three score and ten are given to man
But ours is a much briefer span
And though I give you all my heart
The time will come when we must part
But all around,you will see
Creatures that speak to you of me
A tired horse,a hunted thing,
A sparrow with a broken wing,
Pity,and help,I know you will
And somehow,I'll be with you still
And I shall know,although I'm gone
The love I gave you lingers on.
In loving memory of
KIRBY
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Reply By: Truckster (Vic) - Sunday, Mar 11, 2007 at 20:08
Sunday, Mar 11, 2007 at 20:08
Ours went last week - I'll never get another pet, you get too attached, adn they are never going to be as good as the one you had.
YMMV
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Reply By: Member - Michael J (SA) - Sunday, Mar 11, 2007 at 21:31
Sunday, Mar 11, 2007 at 21:31
Ross,
Not much to add to the other posts, but enjoy your memories.
Like others I too have had to make that decision in the past, never easy.
My current friend/mate/companion/dog is a beautiful german shepherd, and I do not give a RA about what people say about different breeds,,,,,,you get out what you put in...
Ben is now 13yo, pretty deaf, has arthiritis and farts like a brewers horse, (bit like others in the family I guess), we are not looking forward to the inevitable, but we will know when the time is right, just as you have for Kirby.
Enjoy your memories.........
Michael
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Reply By: GU-Nissan - Monday, Mar 12, 2007 at 09:27
Monday, Mar 12, 2007 at 09:27
Thanks to all of you who replied with such sympathy and kind words, this has given both my daughter and myself a much needed boost.
As for the event itself, I cannot speak highly enough of the compassion and professionalism of the vet and staff, they managed to do what was necessary in a very quiet smooth way that allowed Kirby to not be at all stressed or intimidated in any way, and also allowing my daughter and myself room to be close to kirby if we wished.
I think Kirby had some understanding at the end, because he was calmly looking directly into my eyes at the moment the anaesthetic kicked in, and then simply laid his head down onto my arm.
We laid him to rest in a beautiful place underneath a big old ironbark tree on a friends property at Silvan (a place he loved) to the sound of bellbirds filling the air with their song.
Once again to all of you out there, thank you.
Ross Thomson
PS I am also going to post this as a new thread, as this one is now a fair way down the list, and I want to be sure that this gets to all of you.
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Follow Up By: RichieK - Thursday, Mar 15, 2007 at 15:37
Thursday, Mar 15, 2007 at 15:37
So glad you took the time to come back and tell us how it all went...Sounds like Kirby's suffering ended in a beautiful way, surrounded by his loved ones..
Peace
Rich
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