And if so how do you control him !
This note is about coping with such on a recent drive in the Victorian Pyrenees area.
Probably like most here we have several groups we interact with from those who quiver when the road turns to dirt, to those who think where wosses if we don't come
home with at least 1 panel dent.
But do you have a practical joker amongst your group - you know the sort that puts glad wrap over the
toilet bowl or puts conffetti on the blades of a rooms ceiling fan.
On our recent "Satisfying the Wives" trip I carefully documented and mailed everyone an iternary, and followed up with text messages, but it wasn't until night before that the multiple requests came in on how to use this & that etc.
We were to rendevous at Servo coffee
shop initially but no one set there UHF radios right, and all 4 cars went different ways.
We were even sitting in the appointed coffee
shop as one sailed past at 110.
After the roundup a lecture was given at the next coffee stop and its message was lost before everyone left the
carpark.
Our group of 8 was staying at a large and lovely mudbrick cottage from where we were doing day trips, we survived the rest of the trip to the cottages ok and then went out to the Blue Pyrenees winery for a late lunch.
While the girls were pontificating about the features of the wine, behind the scenes the boys were secretly exchanging their glasses in there own experiment to see how much pre-used glasses affect the wine tasting characteristics analysis.
We (all the males) concluded none of it was a good as a crownie anyway !
It then became time for those who left
home in a rush to stop at the
IGA supermarket and buy exotic supplies like bread & milk but as one was going thru the checkout, another yelled out "
check her bag
check her bag , stop thief"
Much embassement was being felt all round, but the offended shopper new the routine having worked at a different supermarket and she grabbed the P.A. mike and called a "code yellow".
Eventually calm was restored and we all left, now fully equipped to face the challenge of the wilderness beyond the blacktop.
Back to our cottage, all sat down for tea around the magnificent table which had lovely scenic place mats, when I thought something didn't quite seem right.
A closer look revealed that the joker had had place mats made from a photo of me in buggie smugglers checking out a
river crossing.
I (Robin) light the large open fire and jumped into the jaccuzi - when the joker (name withheld) began running round with what appeared to be a live buggie, all the girls were shreiking and he threw it into the jaccuzi , fortunately it floated.
Just then the smoke alarms all went off, this accident could not have been better timed.
(Note to myself - next time open the chimmey vent).
Next day we all headed off after letting tyres down except (xxxx) who had one of those fanncy "pulls your valve out tire deflators" , it promptly pulled the valve out fully
and tyre went dead flat before a solution could be found.
This meant his new super duper air compressor could be used for the first time, it worked
well until it quickly overheated its yellow plastic hose and blew the end out.
Still I had one win, after some baggering I managed to get 50% to lower their tyres to less than 25 for the rocky tracks ahead (I knew asking for 18psi was dreaming).
Eager to go, 2 drove off without waiting and promptly went different ways at the very first turn onto the highway.
I re-inforced the fact that all they have to do was follow the little purple line I had pre-loaded to the GPS but it was the very next first turn off the main road which was overshot.
Soon the brave crew was onto the dirt of Sardine track and complaining how easy it was when all of a sudden they were confronted with a couple of rocks the size of cars up a steep
hill.
A careful retreat was begun, and the radios actually carried sensible conversation for nearly 6 whole minutes.
Note The obstruction is at about 54 H 708945 5896140 on Sardine trk and there is a bypass.
At this 3rd wrong turn I took over, "Re-stating the convoy rule about waiting for the next car at each track junction".
Eventually we got to Mt Avoca, whereby our previous leader took off in the wrong direction again despite a sign clearly saying "North Glenpatirck -> " so I took over
and lead the way down this now quite steep and torn up track section.
(4X4 earth has it rated as double black diamond but it isn't,
well not when it was bone dry as per this weekend".
Time for a relaxing evening dinner at the main resturant when during dinner I suddenly yelled out "shes got no bra on" , I was of course pointing thru the huge glass windows, but one of the lady guests thought I was pointing at her,
well I was in danger of being beaten to death with a pink shawl but just in time one of the team
rushed out and wrapped a tea towel around the "Venus de Milo" statue in the garden and calm was temporarily restored.
Next day however at a different coffee
shop we tried to order muggacino's from the menu written on the blackboard, when we were informed that you can't call them black boards or white boards any more, they are now known with the politically correct term of "Chalk boards".
Well ok, I'm obviously from the last century, but we try to fit in, so my wife pointed said that menu item their, whereapon the waitress asked is that from the "white or black " listing ?
At this point I gave up, but not the joker, he loved the stripped Gollywog doll type things on display in the
shop and brought 3 but was also told you can't call them that, where apon he pushed them further down into the large paper carry bag
and continued the transaction by refferring to them as the "stolen generation".
Some of the other coffee customers began to take an interest and within minutes every one in the
shop was discreetly shown the "Stolen Generation" ,
well in all the laughter and carrying on our orders got mixed up and it took another 1/2 hour before all the wives were satistified they got the right morning tea and the
shop owners
were able to hussle as out.
So I get
home and the very first email I open was one offering to make me a life member of this exalted grouping so you can guess what I thought was going on !
Oh
well the next weekends trip is mostly a day drive and all are Exploroz people - so I'm hoping for better !
T.B.C.