Being a cold wet Wednesday in Vic

Submitted: Wednesday, Jul 07, 2004 at 15:15
ThreadID: 14445 Views:1301 Replies:6 FollowUps:5
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Being a cold wet day here in Vic, just thought I would pose a few questions to the forumites sitting around doing nothing
Someone sent me a postcard picture of the earth. On the back it said, "Wish you were here." incidently
Last night I played a blank tape at full blast. The mime next door went nuts.

If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?

If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?

If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?

What's the speed of dark?
How come you don't ever hear about gruntled employees? And who has been dis-ing them anyhow?

Why don't they just make mouse-flavored cat food?

If you're sending someone some Styrofoam, what do you pack it in?

Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?

Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?

whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it?

Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why some people appear bright until you hear them speak?

If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?

Why do you press harder on a remote-control when you know the battery's dead?

Why are they called buildings, when they're already finished? Shouldn't they be called builts?

Why do banks charge you a "non-sufficient funds fee" on money they already know you don't have?

Why is a carrot more orange than an orange?

Why are there 5 syllables in the word "monosyllabic?"

Why do scientists call it research when looking for something new?

Why is it, when a door is open it's ajar, but when a jar is open, it's not a door?



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Reply By: GOB & denny vic member - Wednesday, Jul 07, 2004 at 15:45

Wednesday, Jul 07, 2004 at 15:45
jeez allan you must be really bored today
that nuthin you started with i think i have the other half

lol

steve
AnswerID: 66804

Follow Up By: Allan Mac (VIC) - Wednesday, Jul 07, 2004 at 15:57

Wednesday, Jul 07, 2004 at 15:57
Not Wrong steve, Had a quacks appointment early today.and then a house full of GD's so I hid myself on the puter.
Reckon you can send my other half back now and dont forget the interest
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FollowupID: 327563

Follow Up By: Allan Mac (VIC) - Wednesday, Jul 07, 2004 at 16:45

Wednesday, Jul 07, 2004 at 16:45
Hi Steve,
Boredom about to end..heading into Dimattina's now to meet some of the players and feed my face with pasta etc...just my little bit to support THE team (Southern Magpies Group) Let me know if your interested in the group
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FollowupID: 327570

Reply By: Member - Roachie SA- Wednesday, Jul 07, 2004 at 16:04

Wednesday, Jul 07, 2004 at 16:04
Bloke goes into the butcher shop before xmas and sees a sign on the wall saying "CURED HAMS : $15.99/kilo". He says to the butcher...."I want one that wasn't crook in the first place mate".
AnswerID: 66809

Follow Up By: GOB & denny vic member - Wednesday, Jul 07, 2004 at 16:24

Wednesday, Jul 07, 2004 at 16:24
why are there more photos of nissans rescuing tojos than the other way
tojo owners cant afford cameras after buying said vehicle

lol

steve
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FollowupID: 327566

Reply By: Des Lexic - Wednesday, Jul 07, 2004 at 16:36

Wednesday, Jul 07, 2004 at 16:36
Some Good Ones there Allan.
If you pull the wings of a fly, would you then call it a walk?
AnswerID: 66815

Follow Up By: Allan Mac (VIC) - Wednesday, Jul 07, 2004 at 16:43

Wednesday, Jul 07, 2004 at 16:43
Got hundreds here Des.. Guess I shouldn't have started this.
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FollowupID: 327569

Follow Up By: Willem - Wednesday, Jul 07, 2004 at 17:09

Wednesday, Jul 07, 2004 at 17:09
When is a door not a door?....When it is ajar !
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FollowupID: 327577

Reply By: bigfella - Wednesday, Jul 07, 2004 at 16:47

Wednesday, Jul 07, 2004 at 16:47
I had a dog called "Cigar" I used to take it for a drag every day!!!!!!

What do you call a dog with no legs? Wouldn't matter what you called it, it wouldn't come to you anyway.

Did you hear about the "Down" family? Father- Stan, Mother - Eider and children Pipe and Ben.

AnswerID: 66820

Reply By: Willem - Wednesday, Jul 07, 2004 at 17:03

Wednesday, Jul 07, 2004 at 17:03
I have a dog ....his name is Tax....I open the door....INCOMETAX

What is the difference between a man riding a horse and the dog running beside the horse........The man wears trousers and the dog pants..............
AnswerID: 66823

Reply By: mr diamond - Wednesday, Jul 07, 2004 at 18:34

Wednesday, Jul 07, 2004 at 18:34
if someone attepts suicide and fails.
isnt that just another thing they cant do right??
AnswerID: 66845

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