Friday, Feb 17, 2006 at 22:56
Wow !
What amps does that fridge draw again ?
14 Hours door open, was the thermostat set at room temperature ?
Helloooo ! Lights on but nobody home !
10,9,8,7,...........
This should be good :-))))))
Sounds Like a email I just received...
Last weekend I saw something at Larry's Pistol & Pawn
Shop that sparked my
interest. The occasion was our 22nd anniversary and I was looking for a
little something extra for my wife Toni. What I came across was a
100,000-volt, pocket/purse-sized taser. The effects of the taser were
supposed to be short lived, with no long-term adverse affect on your
assailant, allowing her adequate time to retreat to safety... WAY TOO COOL!
Long story short, I bought the device and brought it home. I loaded two
triple-A batteries in the darn thing and pushed the button. Nothing! I was
disappointed. I learned, however, that if I pushed the button AND pressed it
against a metal surface at the same time; I'd get the blue arc of
electricity darting back and forth between the prongs.Awesome!!!
Unfortunately, I have yet to explain to Toni what that burn
spot is on the
face of her microwave.
Okay, so I was home alone with this new toy, thinking to myself that it
couldn't be all that bad with only two triple-A batteries, right? There I
sat in my recliner, my cat Gracie looking on intently (trusting little soul)
while I was reading the directions and thinking that I really needed to try
this thing out on a flesh & blood moving target. I must admit I thought
about zapping Gracie (for a fraction of a second) and thought better of it.
She is such a sweet cat. But, if I was going to give this thing to my wife
to protect herself against a mugger, I did want some assurance that it would
work as advertised. Am I wrong?
So, there I sat in a pair of shorts and a tank top with my reading glasses
perched delicately on the bridge of my nose, directions in one hand, taser
in another. The directions said that a one-second burst would shock and
disorient your assailant; a two-second burst was supposed to cause muscle
spasms and a major loss of bodily control; a three-second burst would
purportedly make your assailant flop on the ground like a fish out of water.
Any burst longer than three seconds would be wasting the batteries.All the
while I'm looking at this little device measuring about 5" long, less than
3/4 inch in circumference; pretty cute really and loaded with two itsy,
bitsy triple-A batteries) thinking to myself, "no possible way!"What
happened next is almost beyond description, but I'll do my best...
I'm sitting there alone, Gracie looking on with her head thingyed to one
side as if to say, "don't do it master," reasoning that a one-second burst
from such a tiny little ole thing couldn't hurt all that bad... I decided to
give myself a one-second burst just for the heck of it. I touched the prongs
to my naked thigh, pushed the button, and HOLY MOTHER, WEAPONS OF MASS
DESTRUCTION!@&$!%!@*!!!I'm pretty sure Jessie Ventura ran in through the
side door, picked me up in the recliner, then body slammed us both on the
carpet, over and over and over again. I vaguely recall waking up on my side
in the fetal position, with tears in my eyes, body soaking wet, both nipples
on fire, testicles nowhere to be found, with my left arm tucked under my
body in the oddest position, and a tingling in my legs.
The cat was standing over me making meowing sounds I had never heard before,
licking my face, undoubtedly thinking, "do it again, do it again!"Note: If
you ever feel compelled to "mug" yourself with a taser, one note of caution:
there is no such thing as a one-second burst when you zap yourself. You will
not let go of that thing until it is dislodged from your hand by a violent
thrashing about on the floor. A three second burst would be considered
conservative. SON-OF-A-*&^%* that hurt like hell!!!
A minute or so later (I can't be sure, as time was a relative thing at that
point), collected my wits (what little I had left), sat up and surveyed the
landscape. My bent reading glasses were on the mantel of the fireplace. How
did they up get there? My triceps, right thigh and both nipples were still
twitching. My face felt like it had been shot up with Novocaine, and my
bottom lip weighed 88 lbs. I'm still looking for my testicles! I'm offering
a significant reward for their safe return. Still in shock.Eric
Regards Derek from
ABR www.sidewinder.com.au
AnswerID:
155655
Follow Up By: rickwagupatrol - Friday, Feb 17, 2006 at 23:20
Friday, Feb 17, 2006 at 23:20
Derek, what the above has to do with this post, i dont know. But damn, i had a good laugh.
rick.
FollowupID:
409654
Follow Up By: Derek from Affordable Batteries & Radiators - Friday, Feb 17, 2006 at 23:25
Friday, Feb 17, 2006 at 23:25
I was just wondering if those 3 AAA's were deep cycle and if they could run for 14 hours.
FollowupID:
409656
Follow Up By: Mainey (WA) - Saturday, Feb 18, 2006 at 21:53
Saturday, Feb 18, 2006 at 21:53
Derek
you ask:
What amps does that fridge draw again -> "8 amps"
14 Hours door open, was the thermostat set at room temperature -> "No, was left at the normal +1 degree, that's why the fridge cycled and did not run continuously"
Helloooo ! Lights on but nobody home -> Ummm, that would be true, after all I didn’t use a Taser on myself, from memory their directions actually declare the dangers associated with self inflicted use, don’t they??
:-)))
FollowupID:
409755
Follow Up By: Derek from Affordable Batteries & Radiators - Saturday, Feb 18, 2006 at 22:16
Saturday, Feb 18, 2006 at 22:16
Luckily the taser story is not my own and I agree to what instructions say. Did the fridge instructions mention keeping the door closed ? lol ;-)
FollowupID:
409757