The ultimate dumb questions..............................................

Submitted: Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 00:28
ThreadID: 55820 Views:3204 Replies:10 FollowUps:10
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Dumb question Number One

Missus and I were cooking dampers for the crowd this evening at the local Caravan Park as part of a week of festivities in town. We had an array of camp ovens in the coals.

So a tourist of elderly age sidled up to the fire and asked

Q."What are you doing?"

A."Cooking dampers"

Q."Are they inside the camp ovens?"


No answer to that one!!!!! Raise eyebrow skywards and shake head..



Dumb question Number Two(different tourist)

Q " Is the wind going to keep on blowing the the same direction all evening?"

A. " How long is a piece of string?"

Q. "What?"

A. "Nevermind"


Where do these people come from??????????????????


LOL


We cooked 15 dampers and they were devoured by the mob.


Cheers

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Reply By: pop2jocem - Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 00:34

Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 00:34
You dont suppose these people were just trying to make conversation
AnswerID: 294167

Follow Up By: Willem - Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 00:36

Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 00:36
Undoubtedly

But do you need to ask a stupid question?
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Follow Up By: Member - DAZA (QLD) - Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 12:52

Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 12:52
Hi Willem

I love Dampers, we bake them all the time, at home and when we go
camping, We smother them with Treacle / Golden Syrup ect,
We even make a savoury damper and its good with a few beers.

Cheers
Daza
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FollowupID: 560013

Reply By: Member - Davoe (Yalgoo) - Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 00:50

Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 00:50
I dunno.
Asking about the wind cane be a fair question. Someplaces winds can be regular.
In summer in Perth 80kph Easterlys crank up in the evening so if i was asked if they were going to blow in that direction al night the answer would be yes but they will get stronger yet
as for the other bits there probably 1/2 deaf
AnswerID: 294168

Reply By: Gramps (NSW) - Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 00:53

Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 00:53
Probably country folk just a bit disorientated down in the 'Big Smoke' :)))

AnswerID: 294169

Follow Up By: mike w (WA) - Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 01:00

Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 01:00
aren't all the dementia patients let lose on long weekends??

They usually don't like be asked 'dumb questions either ;)
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Reply By: Member - Doug T (FNQ) - Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 03:35

Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 03:35
Willem
Know exactly what you mean...!!!

I travelled the show circuit 1968/70 selling my Gemstones that I had cut and polished and Jewellry,Ribbonstones,Jaspers,Tiger Eye,Opal,Agate, etc,

Old bloke comes up for a geek

Ooooh look at all the shells he says to his bent over old woman.
There was no bloody SHELLS,

During a break I was wandering through the side-Shows

Was talking to one of the showies at a Knock em down stall

Big sign on the wall ...KNOCK 3 DOWN TO WIN A PRIZE
EVERY PLAYER WINS...

Young fella strides up and says .... Whatyagotta do

Gaassspp

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AnswerID: 294174

Follow Up By: Member - Fred G (NSW) - Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 08:53

Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 08:53
Doug :-))) he's gotta get by the Henrys first :-))) to get to #1
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Reply By: Member - Jeff H (QLD) - Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 05:48

Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 05:48
Willem, Gramps and Doug, in order.
1. Willem and you reckon I'VE got a way with words!
Mate, I was cooking scones in the oven at Willare crossing. Makeshift trivett, sitting on three pebbles. Put in three pieces of Thommos dough, gave it time then lifted the lid.
All I saw was three pebbles, no scones. The Lady reckoned the look on my face was priceless.
(The bloody scones had stuck to the lid eh. Don't be too hard on us armchair geriatrics mate).
2.Gramps, that's almost cruel.
3.Doug, bloody eggtimers has got me: 'seven' was right all along. hahaha. Just give me time.
Bed time fellers, and thanks for the giggles.
Jeff.
AnswerID: 294177

Reply By: Member - Kiwi Kia - Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 07:06

Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 07:06
Hi Willem, Before the days of heat beads etc... and a swag man was on foot and not in a camper..... wasn't damper made on a stick or in the ashes and not in a camp oven ? I learnt to make it on a stick. Perhaps the guy that asked was thinking your damper would have been buried in the ashes.


AnswerID: 294180

Follow Up By: Ozboc - Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 08:00

Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 08:00
i was thinking the same thing , perhaps they thought you were making it the traditional way.....
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FollowupID: 559995

Follow Up By: Willem - Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 08:28

Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 08:28
Hmmmm.........Camp ovens on coals......flickering fire on other side. Nothing else except us surging around checking our handiwork (damper mix made by volunteers a short distance away)....enough light to see what was going on.

Swagmen....don't see many of them around any more.....never know....theat cycle might come again
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Follow Up By: Member - Fred G (NSW) - Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 09:43

Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 09:43
Reckon them there tourist folk are gonna remember a windy night, with a good feed in Peterborough, but gollee...that baker fella was cranky old varmint...:-))
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Follow Up By: Willem - Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 12:39

Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 12:39
Dats wot dat ole geezer wif de white hair said when I asked him to move his arse away from me cooking ovens.


LOL


Cheers
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Reply By: peterll - Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 13:45

Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 13:45
Yup..I have had to shake the old head a few times at some things too Willem.

Helping my mate do some extensions to his pub..48 or 50 degrees outside and so we take abreak and lean on the bar with a couple of soft drinks.

Couple of vehicles pull up out front next to the fuel pumps.

First bloke lifts handle inserts nozzle waits..beep beep goes the console..press the button.... he gets diesel..

Second bloke..is in FRONT of the petrol pump.

Sits in his vehicle..waiting waiting..nothing..

He comes in..

How do I get petrol ?

Now I know I was hot and ok a bit cranky.. but I looked at this young fella..brand new vehicle with the works..one of those "Boys with Toys" setups with every conceivable thing required strapped to the racks..aerials all over the place.

This is a few hundred kms from the nearest fuel source..

I got to wondering..

How the heck did you get here from Victoria without putting petrol in your vehicle before ?

AnswerID: 294220

Follow Up By: Des Lexic - Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 14:23

Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 14:23
He got fuel in his car before he had his mother with him and she did everything for him. First trip away without mum and he's stuffed. lol

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FollowupID: 560023

Reply By: Member - The W (WA) - Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 15:03

Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 15:03
Try this one for a daft question Willem.
My husband worked at the caves in the SW of WA as a tour guide while waiting for me to decide when I had enough of working. He use to tell the tourists...
"There are over one hundred known caves in the SW of WA!"
(I can't recall the number but it is something like that) anyhow the point is.....
A tourist almost always asked him the question.....
"How many unknown caves are there then?"
Without fail it would always bring a good laugh from the fellow tourists.
Then they would realise what they had asked.
After that they more often than not went very quiet for the rest of the trip.
This happened so often it really makes you wonder about people.
Some times we humans just ask things without even thinking it thru first.
Oh well I am sure we will all embarrass ourselves again from time to time before we depart this world.
The Wattos.

AnswerID: 294226

Follow Up By: Member - Davoe (Yalgoo) - Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 17:54

Sunday, Mar 23, 2008 at 17:54
Thats actually a fair question as the tour guide at Yanchep mentioned the probability of unknown caves in the area and how many are found each year.
So while the correct question is what the probability of undiscoverd caves around here
people just arnt asking it that way
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FollowupID: 560054

Reply By: Member - Luke (SA) - Monday, Mar 24, 2008 at 00:11

Monday, Mar 24, 2008 at 00:11
Another silly question that gets asked by people is "did you have a hair cut"........ der

Cheers Luke
AnswerID: 294319

Reply By: Muzzgit [WA] - Monday, Mar 24, 2008 at 01:10

Monday, Mar 24, 2008 at 01:10
A couple of years ago we camped down at Black Point [south west WA] and we were having lunch at the lookout above the beach when a car load of young'ns pulled up and started off down the timber steps. I shouted out "watch out for snakes" and as I said that I noticed he hadn't wound up one of his windows and I followed with "you're window's not wound up" to which he replied with fear in his voice "can they get in the car?"

We fell about the place laughing and it still comes up around the camp fire all these years later
AnswerID: 294325

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