Tribal Initiation Gone Wrong...

Submitted: Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 17:45
ThreadID: 13078 Views:1859 Replies:11 FollowUps:43
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Daughter Rhiannan caught me red handed standing behind my Honda, looking all sheepish.
“Whatcha doin’ Dad?” she asked.
“Ummmmmm........ nothing........” I said.
She looks around me and sees the small white disc of Jac Paper lying on the ground.
“Muuuummmmm......... Dad’s put ANOTHER sticker on his car.........”
“Rhiannan” I say......”this sticker is not just your average sticker, it’s an Explore Oz sticker, it has a special significance darling”
She rolls her eyes upwards.....”Okay.......lets hear it.......”

Just as I’m about to explain the significance of the sticker, and how the Lone Wolf has come of age & joined the Tribe, how the initiation process is now completed, Tracy ( Wife ) hops into her car to go shopping.
“Mum!!! Wait for me!!” Rhiannan shouts. “ Sorry Dad.... gotta go with Mum......maybe later...”
Well, talk about rain on my parade! The sticker laying ceremony was falling apart big time.

You see, some things mean a lot to me... I never fought in a war, so I have no medals. I never won a competition, so I have no prizes. I never won a sporting event, so I have no trophies. But, I am now a member of an Exploring Fraternity!!!

Yes, I am going to have to set some ground rules now. If the kids want to borrow my car, they have a responsibility to the Explorer brethren. No picking noses whilst at traffic lights, none of that techno crap coming through MY woofer! These rules must be obeyed, or I may be struck off the forum and banished. Yes...... they must wear the sticker on the rear of my car with pride.

Okay...... move over all you Bad Girls, Pornstars, Kenwoods, & Senior Card Holders, for there’s a new kid on the block! The Lone Wolf who belongs to an Exploring Fraternity!!

Yes, I’m sitting here now fantasising about the ramifications already.........sitting at the lights, and I notice the babe in the car behind me is applying lipstick, pouting at me. Lights go green, she somehow passes me, knowing that in my car there is a rugged outdoorsy guy in the car, and she wants me to chase her!

I tell ya what, hope Tracy doesn’t see this, she’ll peel my sticker off! Probably put it on my son’s car, maybe to help him get a girlfriend, what with the special powers the sticker possesses.

Anyone would think I was hamming it up for another sticker.......... for my other car.........

Okay, I can maybe live without the second sticker, because I have the.......MEMBERSHIP CARD!!!!
Now, the secret with these little babies is this. Forget about flashing your Gold Plated Platinum Shielded Uranium Credit Card, just use it for a serious cash advance, stuff the bills into your wallet, and see if you can get some international currency as well, looks all very James Bond sitting there in your wallet. The sure sign of a ready to jump explorer.......

Now, when you put your Explore Oz card in your wallet, DON’T put it into it’s own little pocket, just place it in loose. This way when you next go to K Mart and you flip open your wallet, it will fall onto the counter, hopefully face up. this will undoubtedly impress the sales assistant to no end, plus you’ve got all this strange money..... all the hallmarks of a rugged world traveller.

Leaving the checkout, knowing full well you’ve done the whole impress bit on the sales assistant & customers lined up behind you, you suddenly hear.......
“Mr Bee.......” You turn around and the pimply faced 17 y/o lad behind the checkout is holding your card up for all to see...........
“....you’ve forgotten your library card sir...........”
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Reply By: Al & Mrs Al (Vic) - Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 17:54

Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 17:54
Geez Ian...too bad you haven't got a rear wheel carrier on the back of your "beast"...you would have been able to put the EO wheel cover on...and really let the world know that there is a "rugged outdoorsy guy" in the car...[or in my case a woman of extraordinary class and sound judgement - who occaisionaly hams it up for her EO friends by masquerading as some Maaaaaaaaaa type person in tartan blankie and straw hat !]

That EO card may not let you borrow books from the local library, but around Australia there are 100s of households it'll bound to get you a cuppa in...a good laugh...and if you're lucky shelter for the night...

cheers

Lyn
AnswerID: 59704

Follow Up By: Lone Wolf - Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 19:02

Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 19:02
Hmmmmmm........ I think a spare wheel cover could be a bit loud. I am a shy retiring not in your face guy..........really............ I don't like to attract attention to myself..........okay......... well maybe a little bit..........aw what the hell.......I'LL BUY ONE!!.........maybe 4 and I'll put them on all........nah..........that's not a good idea......
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Follow Up By: Al & Mrs Al (Vic) - Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 19:10

Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 19:10
you won't be known as the ruggered outdoorsy type then....probably have someone chasing you with a straight jacket....

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Reply By: Member - Ruth D (QLD) - Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 18:50

Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 18:50
That sticker knows no boundaries - could get anything, at the right place - from pest control advice to gynaecological experiments - at 50% discount, as you know Mrs. Al.
AnswerID: 59711

Follow Up By: Lone Wolf - Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 18:56

Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 18:56
Quote........."to gynaecological experiments - at 50% discount"

Yor're scaring me!!
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Follow Up By: Al & Mrs Al (Vic) - Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 19:07

Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 19:07
Well Ruth...I"ve heard rumours on the 50% discount...though..to be honest I'm as scared as Ian...

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Follow Up By: Andrew & Jen (Melb) - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 07:33

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 07:33
I think it could be that there has been another heat wave through Birdsville or maybe the flies are back or maybe it has been the long hours. Maybe a bit of Deslexia.....I think she means "guidance & experience" with the exploroz sticker.
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Follow Up By: Des Lexic - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 21:55

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 21:55
Andrew, to quell my appetite for information, what sort of experiments could I expect to recieve at a 50% discounted rate. or am I having another seniors moment and thinking of the wrong thing.
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Follow Up By: Al & Mrs Al (Vic) - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 22:05

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 22:05
Des do you REALLY want to know?
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Follow Up By: Al & Mrs Al (Vic) - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 22:06

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 22:06
.....it may involve a rubber glove.........
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Follow Up By: Des Lexic - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 22:32

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 22:32
M<aybe yes, Maybe no....
Do you mean those little surgical type ones or the long ones that the Vet's wear?
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Follow Up By: Member - Pesty (SA) - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 22:38

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 22:38
Mrs Al please explain to Mr Lexic what it is that is available at 50% discount from our Resident Physician, we could ORGANise a group viewing on June LWE out in the great outdoors (LMAO) no pun intended.
I know what a benefitial procedure it is, as I was on the Committee that was putting the program together at B/ville. LOLOL
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FollowupID: 321439

Follow Up By: Lone Wolf - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 22:39

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 22:39
What do you call an Amish man with a long Vet's type rubber glove?

Mechanic.......
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Follow Up By: Al & Mrs Al (Vic) - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 22:49

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 22:49
Des..I guess the size of the glove would depend on the size of the procedure

Pesty...do you think a group viewing would prove popular on the long weekend....??...
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Follow Up By: Des Lexic - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 22:53

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 22:53
Reminds me of the story about the Gyno who decided he needed a change in his career path and decided to become a mechanic. He landed a job as an apprentice mechanic and duly completed his training and was required to perform a rebuild of an engine. He completed his task and passed with high distinction actually recieving a mark of 120 out of 100. Puzzled by this mark, he spoke to his examiner and asked how he could get a mark of120/100. The examiner replied that he had rebuilt the engine perfectly as it had started up first time and there were no spare bits laying around. But why the 120 the ex Gyno asked. The examiner said that it was the first time that he had seen a complete rebuild done through an exhaust pipe.
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Follow Up By: Member - Pesty (SA) - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 22:58

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 22:58
Group viewing would be REEEEEL popular if Mr Lexic was willing and a few medicines had been consumed to keep out the cold.
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Follow Up By: Al & Mrs Al (Vic) - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 23:03

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 23:03
damn !..I won't be there...but I'd be happy to see video evidence on Jul 19 in Clare....ahaha..I'm sure Des would be willing....afterall..wouldn't you be.....lol.....

LW..I love the Amish joke by the way...ahhahahha....
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Follow Up By: Des Lexic - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 23:10

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 23:10
You can get to P/Burra through Berri just as easily as through Busted Hill plus the Prickly Pear juice might get all used up here over the weekend and by the time you get there(P/B) it might be just too late.
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Follow Up By: Al & Mrs Al (Vic) - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 23:14

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 23:14
that's true Des...we could detour...

though somehow..I don't think the PP juice wil be all used up...I think they might save us some....[I'd better email and make sure of that....lol]
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Follow Up By: Member - Pesty (SA) - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 23:14

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 23:14
Video evidence machine will be there, and some digi pics for the forum could be posted in minutes with residents laptop?
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Follow Up By: Andrew & Jen (Melb) - Monday, May 24, 2004 at 07:17

Monday, May 24, 2004 at 07:17
Yes, it was one of those nice chilly nights in Melbourne when a man and woman can cuddle up in bed...........and wake the next morning to find his inbox clogged with.......what would you call it Willem??
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Reply By: Willem - Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 19:47

Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 19:47
Small things................
AnswerID: 59714

Follow Up By: Lone Wolf - Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 19:52

Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 19:52
Yeah........ I know....... but hey....... don't take life too seriously, no one ever get's out alive.
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Follow Up By: Andrew & Jen (Melb) - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 07:35

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 07:35
........can be found in old fellas pants.....
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Follow Up By: Willem - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 11:27

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 11:27
........or in middle-aged blokes craniums.............
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Reply By: Member - StevenL - Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 19:57

Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 19:57
I am sure there are drugs available that may help........
AnswerID: 59717

Follow Up By: Lone Wolf - Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 19:59

Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 19:59
I'm on em!!
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Follow Up By: Member - StevenL - Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 20:02

Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 20:02
No not those ones!
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Reply By: Gajm (VIC) - Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 20:20

Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 20:20
Ian, this has to be short cause I can barely type...ok I can't at the best of times....but that was one of the funniest things Ive read in a long time, I'm sure my wife thinks me telling her I'm just off to read the forum is a complete lie now. I was laughing out loud and am nearly in tears (nearly, cause I too am a rugged explorer type lol)

I just don't know whats sadder, your story, or me knowing there's someone else like me out there. I really do have to get out more!

Thanks again for such a good laugh.
Glenn
AnswerID: 59718

Follow Up By: Lone Wolf - Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 20:56

Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 20:56
What, have you got a sticker as well?
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Follow Up By: Gajm (VIC) - Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 21:09

Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 21:09
Um..I asked for 3 when I joined, one for each car and one for the campertrailer. But I decided not to put one on my wifes Charade, (ok maybe she decided) So I made a windbreak for the roof rack of the Patrol (purely to save fuel) and put it up there instead. So now I have twice the women wanting me to chase them as before.....A bloke can dream right?

Maybe the problem is they can't read the front one when they look in the mirror. Something I may have to ask David from EO to rectify
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Follow Up By: Lone Wolf - Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 21:15

Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 21:15
OH MY GOD!!!!! You mean like we can just ASK for extra stickers?

I thought to get my next one I would have to maybe do the Grasshopper thing and place pebble in hand on snatch......whoooops........sorry.........snatch pebble from hand.......where's my drugs?.........

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Follow Up By: Gajm (VIC) - Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 21:49

Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 21:49
I don't know if we can just ASK for extra stickers!....It's a hell of a lot more complicated than that. When I joined there was a order box with membership, and stickers typed in it...I had to change the 1 in stickers, to a 3, and voila!

By the way, just what drugs are you using?....I think quite a few of us might try getting some, or is this the sedated version of Ian we are seeing? or is it simply as my daughter would yell to her mum 'Dad is being dad again!!'?

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Follow Up By: Lone Wolf - Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 22:06

Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 22:06
No drugs.......

Just happy to have survived:

Heart Attack
Blood Clot in lung
Giving up smoking
2 Teenage kids
27 years of marriage
Introduction of GST
And finally, I use an Apple Computer.......oh dear..here we go........bugger......IBM vs Apple.......Tojo vs Nissan
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Follow Up By: Gajm (VIC) - Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 22:24

Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 22:24
Well done, good to see are still with us after all that...but if you can survive 27 years of marriage and still get out of bed in the morning, you can survive anything!....just my theory, haven't got there yet...I don't want to think about it, It has that mind numbing affect like trying to work out where the galaxy ends
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Follow Up By: Des Lexic - Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 23:10

Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 23:10
Geez Ian, They gunna drag you off screaming to put you in a coffin too. Way to go.
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Reply By: Rosco - Bris. - Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 21:46

Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 21:46
Keep up the good work old mate. A welcome relief to some of the stuff ya get here.

But go easy ... OK. I need time for my ribs to heal.
AnswerID: 59725

Follow Up By: Lone Wolf - Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 21:56

Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 21:56
Are you multi stickeral? I'm getting the feeling that there are those that have been blessed with EXTRA STICKERS!!

I am starting to feel like an orphan, a lonely little wolf cub....... perhaos the sticker god can come th the rescue....... I promise I won't put one on my L 300 Rust Bucket......honest!!
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Follow Up By: GOB & denny vic member - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 00:49

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 00:49
ha hah ha ive got 3 stickers 1 on the nissan 1 for the new van and a spare i am not sure yet where it will go AND I DONT NEED ANY SUGGESTIONS LOL
steve
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Follow Up By: Rosco - Bris. - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 13:56

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 13:56
How can I put it ...... in short, I'm a stickerphobe. Always have been. So now I suffer the eternal conundrum ... to stick or not to stick, that is the question.

On the one hand I abhore stickers in any shape or form, especially those unwanted ones that ppls apply to your vehicle when it goes somewhere to have something done. Take Bob Jane outlets as an example.

On the other hand I cannot think of any other sticker I'd rather attach to the beast.

Decisions .. decisions
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Reply By: Member - PatC - Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 22:45

Saturday, May 22, 2004 at 22:45
You guys are taking multiple stickers and here I am stickerless... I feel like one of those guys they use to have guarding the harems...
AnswerID: 59730

Follow Up By: Lone Wolf - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 04:37

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 04:37
GOB & denny have a spare!!
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Follow Up By: GOB & denny vic member - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 19:41

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 19:41
stickers are easy to get the more you buy from eo shop the more you get( stickers)

steve
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Reply By: Eric from Cape York Connections - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 06:41

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 06:41
I had better get another sticker because nothing like that has happened to me.

Cant wait
Eric
CyC
AnswerID: 59749

Follow Up By: Lone Wolf - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 09:09

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 09:09
Right, here's the plan........ if we do this thing together, we can overcome the sticker god. You distract him from the front while I grab him from the rear.

We shall go into battle together, and hopefully come out the other side unscathed, and maybe unstuck, in the holy quest to hand out stickers to those that need them the most.

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Reply By: Al & Mrs Al (Vic) - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 09:36

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 09:36
Ian the Sticker God has smiled generously on me, and I have in my possession a stack of EO stickers...I'm happy to share, though I've found the best way to get hold of said holy articles is to ask and verily you shall be rewarded...

Lyn
AnswerID: 59761

Follow Up By: Lone Wolf - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 14:27

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 14:27
Thats it!!!! I'm saying my prayers tonite.........

"Oh mighty Sticker God, who resides on the Net...

Please shine down on me, although we've never met...

Set up your Press, Inks & Paper, and be ready because...

I want another sticker, that says EXPLORE OZ!!!

Will that do???
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Follow Up By: Al & Mrs Al (Vic) - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 15:24

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 15:24
you're in with a chance Ian....
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Follow Up By: Bonz (Vic) - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 16:57

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 16:57
Ian,

You are starting to scare me.
.
Time is an illusion produced by the passage of history
.

Lifetime Member
My Profile  My Blog  My Position  Send Message
Moderator

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FollowupID: 321396

Reply By: rolande- Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 09:54

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 09:54
I've got a sticker too!

Can I be part of the your gang?

Please?

AnswerID: 59767

Follow Up By: rolande- Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 09:56

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 09:56
See, I even miss-typed and pressed SUBMIT before checking it, doesn't that mean I deserve to be in the gang?
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Follow Up By: Lone Wolf - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 14:32

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 14:32
The more the merrier!!!

If ya join yp one day, put my name down, then I get points or something lol......
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Reply By: Member - Melissa - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 11:46

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 11:46
RAOFLMAO!

:o) Melissa
AnswerID: 59775

Follow Up By: Member - Pesty (SA) - Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 21:04

Sunday, May 23, 2004 at 21:04
That would be a sight !!!LOL
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