New survey

A recent poll of journalists found in pubs and employed by city newspapers recorded some surprising results, according to Dr Thisis Allbull.
"We found that there is a a great deal of similarity between the personality types typically found within the industry," he said.
Journalists tended to have materials obsession. This often resulted from acute jealousy of anyone who owned something that they couldn't afford according to Dr Allbull. They were less tolerant of anything that could score them a headline, and often considered to be from the left in their politics.
Dr Allbull noted that it was obvious that journalists were not to blame for the recent anti 4wd movement. "Some of the loudest opponents to 4wds own 4wds themselves" he noted. "Of course with recent fuel increases they can't afford to actually drive them."
The survey also found that many journalists had a natural aversion to the truth, had only one eye and were grossly underweight. "In the main, they were more likely to have a non mainstream lifestyle, and spent more time looking at themselves in the mirror" the survey found.