phunnie for the ladies
Submitted: Sunday, Nov 13, 2005 at 02:10
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techie
1. Men are like .....Laxatives . They irritate the sh1t out of you.
2. Men are like .....Bananas . The older they get, the less firm they are.
3. Men are like ... Weather ... Nothing can be done to change them.
4. Men are like ... Blenders ... You need one, but you're not quite sure why.
5. Men are like ... Chocolate Bars .. Sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips.
6. Men are like ... Commercials . You can't believe a word they say.
7. Men are like ... Department Stores ... Their clothes are always 1/2 off.
8. Men are like ... Government Bonds ... They take soooooooo long to mature.
9. Men are like .... Mascara . They usually run at the first
sign of emotion.
10. Men are like .. Popcorn . They satisfy you, but only for a little while.
11. Men are like ... Snowstorms . You never know when they're coming,
how many inches you'll get or how long it will last.
12. Men are like .... Lava Lamps .. Fun to look at, but not very
bright.
13. Men are like...
Parking Spots ....... All the good ones are taken, the rest are handicapped.
Reply By: Member - Phil [Sunshine Coast] - Sunday, Nov 13, 2005 at 04:30
Sunday, Nov 13, 2005 at 04:30
Three words to ruin a mans ego..
'is it in ?
Back to bed now, until the league starts.
AnswerID:
139151
Reply By: ev700 - Sunday, Nov 13, 2005 at 14:55
Sunday, Nov 13, 2005 at 14:55
A police constable pulls over a speeding car. The constable says, "I clocked you at 80 kph in a 60 zone, sir."
The driver says, "Gee, constable I had it on cruise control at 60 kph, perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating.
Not looking up from her knitting the wife says: "Now don't be silly dear, you know that this car doesn't have cruise control."
As the officer writes out the ticket, the driver looks over at his wife and growls, "Can't you please keep your mouth shut for once?"
The wife smiles demurely and says, "You should be thankful your radar detector went off when it did."
As the constable writes out the second ticket for the illegal radar detector unit, the man glowers at his wife and says through clenched teeth, "Darn it, woman, can't you keep your mouth shut?"
The officer frowns and says, "And I notice that you're not wearing your
seat belt, sir. That's an automatic $100 fine and three extra points."
The driver says, "Yeah,
well, you see constable, I had it on, but took it off when you pulled me over so that I could get my licence out of my back pocket."
The wife says, "Now, dear, you know very
well that you didn't have your
seat belt on. You never wear your
seat belt when you're driving."
And as the police officer is writing out the third ticket the driver turns to his wife and barks, "WHY DON'T YOU PLEASE SHUT UP??"
The officer looks over at the woman and asks, "Does your husband always talk to you this way, Madam?"
"Only when he's been drinking."
AnswerID:
139178