An Australian Wheat Board Poem

Submitted: Thursday, Mar 09, 2006 at 11:05
ThreadID: 31567 Views:1884 Replies:2 FollowUps:1
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Thanks to Badger who posted this on another site, which I thought he would not mind me sharing with you learned individuals.

I had written him a letter
which I had, for want of better
Knowledge, sent to where I met him at the Wheat Board years ago.
He was chairman when I knew him,
so I sent the letter to him
just on spec, to make the point that "Howard doesn't want to know".

And an email came directed,
not entirely unexpected
(And I think the same was written in some Middle Eastern bar)
'Twas his CEO who wrote it,
and verbatim I will quote it,
"Trevor Flugge's gone to Baghdad and we don't know where he are"

But when he left Australia,
he was going to meet with Alia,
A trucking mob in Jordan who were keen to grease the wheels.
For 10% commission,
they could swing Saddam's permission
To get our wheat accepted: it's the mother of all deals.

But I guarantee, Prime Minister,
that there's nothing all that sinister:
The chaps at DFAT told us that the sums looked quite OK.
When you're selling wheat in billions,
what's a quick $300 million?
If it keeps the Nationals happy, it's a tiny price to pay.

Sitting here at Kirribilli,
I've been thinking, willy nilly,
That it's somehow reminiscent of the children overboard:
But I can handle Rudd and Beasley
as I always do, quite easily,
By endlessly protesting that there's nothing untoward.

I'll tell Bush next time I meet him,
at the White House, when I greet him,
That I'm sure he'll understand about the Wheat Board's quid pro quo:
He'll forgive this minor error
in the global war on terror
When I look him in the eye and tell him "Howard didn't know".

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Reply By: Footloose - Thursday, Mar 09, 2006 at 19:23

Thursday, Mar 09, 2006 at 19:23
With apologies to A B Patterson ? Excellent adaptation, well thought out and spot on timing. Not politically correct (thank goodness:).
AnswerID: 159559

Reply By: Member - Roachie (SA) - Thursday, Mar 09, 2006 at 20:13

Thursday, Mar 09, 2006 at 20:13
AnswerID: 159567

Follow Up By: Member - Roachie (SA) - Thursday, Mar 09, 2006 at 20:14

Thursday, Mar 09, 2006 at 20:14

FollowupID: 414197

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