OT Telstra calling...........Grumpy Old Man answers

Submitted: Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 16:47
ThreadID: 53624 Views:1826 Replies:13 FollowUps:5
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I am deep into my Nana nap this arvo when the plurry siren goes off next to me

Hello?

This is Telstra, Sir.

Yes?

Are you Mr X, Sir?

Yes.

Can I verify yoiur date of birth please Sir?

What for?

To know that you are Mr X

You rang me

Yes Sir, but I still need to verify your details

OK ddmmyyyy

Thank you, Sir. I wish to advise you that this call may be monitored for teaching and coaching purposes and please tell me if you do not wish to do so.

Thats a load of bulls.h.i.t!

What??

I said its a load of bulls.h.i.t

SILENCE

I'm sorry sir but thats the way it is.

Yes but I don't need to and don't want to hear it. Anyway why are you calling me. Are you trying to sell me something?

No Sir, I am not trying to sell you something.

Then why are you ringing me?

I am ringing to see if you are happy with your plan

Ah! so that I can change my plan and spend more money with you.

No Sir.

That's bulls.h.i.t

What?!!!!!

Look, go and annoy someone else



Hit KILL button



Bloody Telco's





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Reply By: Gramps (NSW) - Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 16:50

Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 16:50
Hahahahaha you gave them more time than I would have :)))

AnswerID: 282284

Reply By: Pajman Pete (SA) - Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 16:58

Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 16:58
So they got you on a good day Willem?
Any mug can be uncomfortable out bush

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AnswerID: 282286

Follow Up By: Scoof - Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 17:02

Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 17:02
Al they wanted to know was is he happy or not. LOL
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FollowupID: 546787

Reply By: Member - Andrew (QLD) - Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 17:06

Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 17:06
I would have verified his details FIRST......Full name please, DOB, Employee Number, Location, nearest Cross Street, Postcode, Current weather, time there, current share price, etc.........

Can never be too careful with these suckers.....

Andrew
AnswerID: 282290

Reply By: Member - Axle - Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 17:08

Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 17:08
Just wait till the overseas calls start!!.


The worry about all these turkeys is that they can leave your line engaged, if you tick em off.


Cheers Axle.
AnswerID: 282291

Reply By: Member - Alan H (Narangba QLD - Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 17:10

Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 17:10
Put such calls on hold (Ask them to wait a minute) and then leave the phone. After a few minutes they give up and hangup but their analysis software has them wasting time and taking too long on the call.

A bit like when we try to call telstra.

LOL

Alan
AnswerID: 282293

Follow Up By: baldman - Saturday, Jan 19, 2008 at 13:37

Saturday, Jan 19, 2008 at 13:37
I used to manage outsourced call centres for a few of the major telco's.

Putting them on hold makes them happy because it is a justifiable additional break for them.

The dialling technology and strategies are amazing and by utilising dialling history they can just about ping you when they want.

The best defence against telemarketers is attack. When they call let them proceed with their opening and let then tell you that they want to update your service offer you good or whatever.

Once you have found out the reason for their call, ie to re contract your service, feign dismay and tell them that only 10 minutes ago you had a call from their company and have already agreed to accept the offer. (Tell them you did a voice recording)

Tell them you spoke to (pick a western name) but say they sounded indian (as many operators use a pseudonym).Tell them you are bleep off and this is the second call you have received since accepting the offer. This means rather than a 100% success rate on your number, it has now dropped to 33%.

As the operators use any excuse to complain about data, this will go to their Team Leader, who will report it to the Call Centre Manager. The result is an instant halt to dialling as this will panic the manager into thinking the call conclusion codes are not tipping back into the system as required. This indicates their reporting is wrong and will lower their results from the campaign resulting in loss of income.

This can stop dialing for up to 2-3 hours. Think of it up to 200 staff at $18 per hour sitting idle for 3 hours. Over a 10K cost plus almost the equivalent in lost income, a 20K impact.

Nasty I know but it works.

baldman
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FollowupID: 547007

Follow Up By: Gramps (NSW) - Saturday, Jan 19, 2008 at 13:55

Saturday, Jan 19, 2008 at 13:55
LOL it's easier to just not answer calls from "Private" or "Out of Area" numbers. Let the answering machine with Caller ID do it's job.

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FollowupID: 547008

Follow Up By: baldman - Saturday, Jan 19, 2008 at 21:37

Saturday, Jan 19, 2008 at 21:37
Al,

since the introduction of the "Do Not Call" register the legislation has been changed to make it compulsory that telemarketing call centres are not allowed toblock their numbers. However if you call the number they provide you get a static message advising you that you have beeh called by a contact centre.

baldman
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FollowupID: 547098

Follow Up By: Gramps (NSW) - Saturday, Jan 19, 2008 at 22:09

Saturday, Jan 19, 2008 at 22:09
Baldman,

The laws are only observed by the law abiding. There are plenty of calls, with no messages, from Private and 'Out of Area' callers every week. Sure, some could be wrong numbers but not all of them :))))))

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FollowupID: 547107

Reply By: Member - JohnR (Vic)&Kath - Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 17:13

Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 17:13
Glad you didn't encourage em to call anybody else. What would have been like after the grumpy pills?
Cheers,
Who?
John

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AnswerID: 282295

Reply By: Kiwi & "Mahindra" - Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 17:33

Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 17:33
they rang me on the new phone once and wanted to know how it was going.....i made scratchy noises and pretended I couldnt hear her and said that if she wants the phone back then she could have it cos its crap and doesnt work....gave it a few seconds and then hung up!!


Good on ya Willem....

Laura
AnswerID: 282304

Reply By: Member - steve H (QLD) - Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 17:54

Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 17:54
i had a guy a few years ago ring me and try to sell me clading for my new brick home. While I was on the phone to him I noticed his number came up on caller ID (he must have been working from home) so i wrote the number down. Because he was so pushy I decided to get up at 3 in the morning and ring his number. When he answered I went on with a speel about home electrical safety. I dont know why but it made me feel good to have revenge on a telemarketer.

Steve
AnswerID: 282318

Reply By: Michael ( Moss Vale NSW) - Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 18:14

Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 18:14
HAA !! LOVE IT!!
Patrol 4.2TDi 2003

Retired 2016 and now Out and About!

There's time to rest when you're dead,
Get out and do something instead!

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AnswerID: 282323

Reply By: Member - Michael J (SA) - Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 20:29

Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 20:29
Serves you right Mr X..........

Should not be snoozing when us honest people are working...


LOL LOL

AnswerID: 282358

Reply By: Bonz (Vic) - Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 21:56

Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 21:56
DONT TELL ME we have the SAME BIRTHDAY

ddmmyyyy

Are you my TWIN BROTHER?


Hahahaha Willem that is a classic, No way would I have given them my DOB, they made the call they can state why they called.
.
Time is an illusion produced by the passage of history
.

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AnswerID: 282383

Reply By: Member - Littleborgy (SA) - Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 22:26

Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 22:26
LMAO

Love it Willem... You should've put it in the Friday Funnies.

Cheers, Brad
AnswerID: 282391

Reply By: Trekkie (Member - WA) - Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 22:55

Friday, Jan 18, 2008 at 22:55
Whenever the ATO, my bank, my Telco or anyone else rings me and then asks for my ID, I ALWAYS refuse to give it on the basis that I do not know who they are and they could be fishing for my ID etc

I tell them to write to me with their details and I will then call them. Its surprising how few actually write.
AnswerID: 282397

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