Completely O/T. Footy for GG !

Submitted: Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 18:18
ThreadID: 54198 Views:1615 Replies:4 FollowUps:15
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Now there’s been some talk about the appointment of a new Governor General, and the Govt seems to want to employ a non-politician without a VC.

To this end, I hereby submit my qualifications for the job.

Ta Rah !

Footy for GG!!


Extinguished appearance

Non-illegal drugs history (I never inhaled, honest )

Honest person (unless you're the tax man or ...or...or...)

Non - drinker (well maybe one a year)

Kind to little old ladies (especially if they're rich)

No police record (no puters in my day)

No scandals lurking (what woman? I did NOT have coffee with that woman)

Widely traveled (some parts of me wider than others)

Well edumacated (far too well, what a know it all!)

Vast store of wide experiences (and skinny ones too)

So straight I’m boring. (ain’t that the truth!)

Can sack Govts without blinking.... easily

Impervious to bribes (and who would want to bribe a GG anyway?)

Long history of public service (worked for them for years)

Convenient memory (that has to be a plus around pollies)

Can even cut the lawns at Govt house....cost cutting par excellence.

Can be dressed in a bag of fruit and still look like a sack of potatoes (Irish background somewhere in there)

Will refuse to wear a hankie in his top pocket (more cost cutting)

Will never attend the Melbourne Cup (now that will save money). I mean who wants to go to Melbourne anyway?

Can sit around drinking Coca Cola with dignitaries all day and night (if they don’t leave I can throw em out). Another cost cutting exercise)

Has a desire to spend innumerable hours drinking and snoozing at public functions where there’s a freebie.

Can say sorry all the time (I already do!)

Can provide advice to the Govt fleet of 4wds...as long as they don't use Nissans.

Would travel to places where they haven’t seen a pollie...never mind a GG.

I'd even consider providing my own bulletproof vest...if the salary was right. (VERY right)

No Fedpol protection necessary...I have my own dogs who would lick intruders to death.

Has the time and vigor (yawn, is it snooze time yet?) to fill this crucial post for the foreseeable future.

Comes from the same state as the PM.

Believes in jobs for the boys.

Wife doesn’t run any multinational companies.

No conflict of interest. (What interest?)

Even though a non-drinker, will support the Free Beer Party. (Now that should be worth a vote or two:)






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Reply By: Gramps (NSW) - Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 18:22

Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 18:22



You got my votes (all of them) Footy.

AnswerID: 285397

Follow Up By: Footloose - Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 18:30

Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 18:30
Thanks, Gramps. Bit of O/T humour on a rainy Sunday.
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Reply By: Member - Kim M (VIC) - Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 18:26

Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 18:26
Footy

Your a dag!

I assume your not planning to visit Wiluna over the next few years

LOL

Regards

Kim

AnswerID: 285398

Follow Up By: Footloose - Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 18:29

Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 18:29
My Goodness, not unless I become GG.
Well not until they pull the banner on the pub down, the one that says "welcome to paradise" :)
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Follow Up By: Footloose - Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 18:39

Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 18:39
Kim, just had a thought. The free beer party at Wiluna is put on by the mines for the locals at Xmas, not the GG :)))))))
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Follow Up By: Member - Kim M (VIC) - Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 20:00

Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 20:00
Footy

Unfortunatly you need to be a five year registered oraganisation before that can happen.

Why don't we get old Henry Ward all fired up to support your correnation at Wiluna?

Rudd and his missus would root their boots after a couple of days at Glenayle Station.
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Follow Up By: Member - Kim M (VIC) - Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 20:03

Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 20:03
Footy

Unfortunaty you need to be a five year registered organisation before that can happen.

Why don't we get old Henry Ward all fired up to support your correnation at Wiluna?

Rudd and his missus would root their boots after a couple of days at Glenayle Station.

LOl

Regards

Kim

PS sorry about the spelling
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Follow Up By: Footloose - Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 20:07

Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 20:07
Coronation ? Umm...gulp..isn't that for , like, Queens of the desert ? Hey, if the job means I have to turn to the dark side, NO WAY !! I haven't even seen the movie, that's how straight I am ! LOL
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Follow Up By: Footloose - Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 20:10

Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 20:10
OMG ! Is that why they have a "boot tree" outside the mine ?
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Reply By: Member - barry F (NSW) - Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 18:47

Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 18:47
So how should we address you in future on this Forum?? Sir Footy? or would you prefer Sir Footloose. Maybe Sir lost footing? How would Sir foot in mouth suit your new status. LOL & cheers.
AnswerID: 285404

Follow Up By: Footloose - Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 18:52

Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 18:52
Not sure I like this Sir business. I was called Sir for many years, and many didn't spell it with an "Si" but with a "Cu" LOL

Anyway, you forgot the obvious, "Sir Cumference" LOL
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Follow Up By: Kev & Darkie - Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 19:13

Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 19:13
Barry,

He should be called "Sir Giddy Up", being the GG after all :))

Cheers Kev
Russell Coight:
He was presented with a difficult decision: push on into the stretching deserts, or return home to his wife.

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Follow Up By: Gone Bush (WA) - Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 19:23

Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 19:23
Sir Kum-Sized
I'm glad I ain't too scared to be lazy
- Augustus McCrae (Lonesome Dove)

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Follow Up By: Footloose - Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 20:02

Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 20:02
Sorry, not a holocaust survivor.
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Follow Up By: Footloose - Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 20:03

Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 20:03
"Sir Giddy Up?" Isn't he the patron saint of horseracing ?
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Reply By: Richard Kovac - Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 20:56

Sunday, Feb 03, 2008 at 20:56
Why are you an Australian?
AnswerID: 285426

Follow Up By: Footloose - Monday, Feb 04, 2008 at 06:57

Monday, Feb 04, 2008 at 06:57
What's an Australian ?
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Follow Up By: Richard Kovac - Monday, Feb 04, 2008 at 21:49

Monday, Feb 04, 2008 at 21:49
well being a member of the Australian Republican Movement..

The next Head of state will be on Ozi...

Cheers

Richard

By the Way you only need to be an Australian Citizen..
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Follow Up By: Footloose - Monday, Feb 04, 2008 at 22:01

Monday, Feb 04, 2008 at 22:01
What? I'd have to change my religion? Have to think about that !
:)))))))))

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